A Mother Blessing: Honouring the Mother

When my dear friend Gosia announced to me that she was pregnant, I was completely overcome with joy and emotion. In the run up to her last trimester, she asked me if I would be up for organising her baby shower, I was so excited and agreed straightaway. 

I love Amanda’s workshops, so I was over the moon when she agreed to organise my baby blessing.
— Gosia

Having been to baby showers before, I remember feeling a strong aversion to the way this special moment was often celebrated. The naff party games of pooey nappies, somehow laughing together about the drudgery of caring for a baby seemed, to me an odd way to be celebrating. The playing of tedious rounds of baby bingo, check-listing all the items you're expected to have at your disposal, left me feeling underwhelmed. From nipple creams to pacifiers, buggies to baby bouncers - it seemed to focus completely on material possessions - reading like an endless shopping list to 'prepare' for motherhood.  The joy of it all seemed to be rudely hijacked by a capitalist endorsement. The game I found most bizarre, was placing bets on the weight of the newborn baby. To me it felt so distasteful to ultimately be gambling with something so closely linked to the health of an unborn child.

I knew instantly that for this occasion I was going to organise something entirely different, not another baby shower. It needed to be something that represented the beautiful transition from maiden to mother.  

A Blessing-way is the name of a traditional a Navajo coming of age ritual honouring the divine feminine. By taking elements of it, I crafted a sisterly gathering to support new mother into her journey from pregnancy, through to birth and into motherhood. Out of respect to the indigenous heritage of this ritual, my interpretation is best referred to as a 'Mother Blessing'. Unlike baby showers, where the material focus on gifting to the baby, we sent wishes and crafted loving gifts to the Mother instead.

The afternoon was planned like so:

Arrival & Tea 

We each arrived to greet Gosia and seated ourselves on the floor in a sisterly circle, sharing tea. I invited everyone to bring a single flower, which we placed in front of her.

 
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Heart Opening

I welcomed everyone and introduced the Mother Blessing and the sentiment behind it. We then passed around a candle and each introduced ourselves and our relationship to Gosia. This was a wonderful way of getting to know each other and we shared a heart warming memory about a time we spent together. We finished by sending her a wish for her journey into motherhood.

 
Passing the candle around the circle.

Passing the candle around the circle.

The circle is set with oracle cards.

The circle is set with oracle cards.

 

We then each tied a red string bracelet around our wrists to represent our support through to the birth. In this way we agreed to symbolically cut the string once the baby's chord is cut.

Blessing & Crafting

I guided the group to make several hand-crafted gifts for Gosia. In doing so we adorned her with positive and meaningful energies for her journey. This included:

~ a floral headdress - we each wove our flower into it, creating a crown of abundance for her to wear. Afterwards we made smaller crowns for ourselves with the leftover blooms.

~ a protective rose quartz bead bracelet, passed around and hand-threaded

~ a traditional Polish pom-pom pajaki mobile to hang above the baby's crib

 
Gosia was born in Poland so a Polish Pajaki chandelier was a meaningful creation to pass to the baby.

Gosia was born in Poland so a Polish Pajaki chandelier was a meaningful creation to pass to the baby.

 

Circle of Intention

We finished by inviting the mother to sit or lie down in the centre of our circle with her crown and bracelet. Sitting around her, we enjoyed a gentle guided meditation together, sending all our love, light and positive thoughts to her and the baby. 

 
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Feasting

We ended our ritual by enjoying delicious food we can share in celebration. Every woman brought a homemade dish to savour together.

It was a really special afternoon and we all felt so blissed out. What an honour to create such a memorable circle.

When I arrived and saw the sacred space Amanda had created, I remember being so relieved that this was not a typical baby shower.

It felt incredibly inclusive, the circular space invited everyone to interconnect beautifully! The emphasis wasn’t on diaper games and the toils of motherhood, but instead it was focused on helping me reconnect with the women in my life and for them to connect with me in this stage.

I felt loved and filled with encouragement. The baby mobile and flower crown making brought out everyone’s creativity, and made some magical memories. When we ended with a beautiful meditation by Amanda, I was so moved that everyone, even those who never meditated loved it and commented on how relaxed they felt!

The whole day unfolded beautifully and Amanda made me feel like one special mamma.
— Gosia

 

If you'd like to organise a meaningful Mother Blessing for an expectant mother - the Head & Hands way - Get in touch at helloheadandhands@gmail.com

- Amanda